The Big House

Hit it boys This is Russia's premier state funded hotel We're very proud of our eclectic clientele Excellence in service since 1932 Don't believe what you read in the online reviews It's the Big House The perfect getaway Welcome into the Big House You'll never get away It's no Hilton or no Hyatt But you will have a riot So please enjoy your stay Here's the dining room, the menu is minimal What the cook does to the food is criminal Pull up a seat frog, grab yourself a stool May I recommend you try our famous gruel In the Big House You'll never be alone Life ain't bad in the Big House No, froggy, no Check out after ten Or eleven years Make yourself at home Accommodation is far superior Than anything else you will find in Siberia Let me know if there's anything you need Everything is free, money back guaranteed In the Big House, you will not survive When you arrive in the Big House, run for your life It's the Big House The perfect getaway Welcome into the Big House You'll never get away For your security I'll keep the only key Now please enjoy your stay